It makes me sick to my stomach to read statistics showing that around 40% of teens think that Rhianna deserved to get beat up and that this type of violence is 'normal' in a relationship. That 40% includes girls.

Excuse me... what the hell are you talking about?

I watched Oprah's special about this yesterday. I wanted to physically shake the girl that thought Rhianna deserved it because its alleged that she hit Chris Brown. So what if she did slap him once or twice, he could have subdued her, kicked her out of the car, or whatever. Beating the crap out of her where is has bruises all over, was not called for or legal for that matter.

And now she's back with him... what does this say. It saddens me and scares me that kids think its ok.

While I have never been physically abused by a boyfriend, I did date one that was extremely controlling and tried to tell me that I was nothing without him. Luckily, he dumped me because I didn't adhere to his 'rules' the way I was suppose to. The next girl he dated (whom he cheated on me with, who was supposed to have been my friend) it was rumored that he did hit her. I can see him doing that, he had a very bad temper. Oh... and this was all during my sophomore year of high school. I count myself as lucky to get out of that relationship.

I really think it leads to parents taking a more active role in their children's lives. These poor girls have low esteem and think at some level they deserve this. Love doesn't hurt and it doesn't leave bruises. If they'll hit you once, they will hit you again. Don't fool yourself. Be Smart.

"When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things."


Today, I had to be an adult and deal with adult things. The Jetplanes know 2 couples that are around our age and are married. One is a military and the other isn't. The mil couple have been married for under 2 years (I believe) and the other has been married for 3 years (together for 11 yrs) Both are separated and leaning towards divorce, the mil couple will most definitely be getting a divorce.

Today, in Target I ran into the non-mil guy we're friends with, and heard "from the horse's mouth" about their issues and separation. Right near the shampoo and body wash endcap, I listened to him pour his heart out about their marriage and what his therapist has to say about it. My heart goes out to him. I'll admit I don't know his wife, they were never together. She didn't want to go out with him when we'd meet for drinks, dinner, winging parties, movies, or when we went to the circus one afternoon. The Jetplanes honestly didn't think she existed since we only met her once and that was my complete accident when we bumped into them at a restaurant one night. She was cold and unfriendly, the polar opposite of him.

He told me how they didn't really have anything in common. She is extremely involved in her faith and her church. He converted for her in high school, and was now attending church or church functions at least 5 days a week. While, he will still be attending the church, its too much for him, its not the path he wants. They were no longer intimate and she didn't seem to mind.

He said that they had talked about having kids, and he realized that he wanted to have a child so they would have something in common.

Wow! Standing in the health and beauty section of Target I realized, I'm now a married woman, and these issues are real. You can't just break up like you did in college. These are serious, life-altering decisions. I'm an adult now and divorce isn't just something that my parents dealt with, its something are friends are going to start dealing with. And that breaks my heart. I'm so thankful, that even though Mr. Jetplane and I are apart due to the USAF, we're very much in love and can't imagine life without the other. We support each other and need each other. We're each other's best friend but we're also each other's life partner. We're going on this journey together, and I can't imagine the pain I would feel to see that disappearing.

I hope both of these couples are able to find their own happiness with the most minimal heart ache and pain in the process.

How do you all deal with this? What are you suppose to say? And other mil wives, is unfaithfulness common around you as well? I know a few couples that haven't been faithful and issues have came up.