Fellow Travelers

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Hello Mr. Jetplane's Mouth...Insert Foot


So I love my husband. He's a great guy. He's a funny guy. And if you know him in real life, you'd know he's a guy that doesn't always think before opening his mouth. I've tried to teach him about this, and he is getting better around other people, when its just him and me...thoughts enter his head and then come right out his big ol mouth.

So I'll set the scene for you...

Jetplanes both worked late last night and I needed to pick up my prescription the store nearby. So we decided to go eat some pizza. While eating our salads and Mr. enjoying a beer, I commented on how pissed I am that our base selection night got moved AGAIN...(yeah we're not finding out tomorrow, its been pushed to Monday). He asked why I am so upset about it.


Me: "I really feel like our lives have been on hold. We can't make any next steps in our lives until we find out where we're going."


Mr: "Yeah so if we find out we're going to Idaho we can work on getting you knocked up?"
(ever my eloquent husband, right?)

Me: "Yeah, maybe. But not until after my birthday...I want to get drunk!"

Mr: (rolling his eyes) "Whatever you say..."

So time passes and we get our pizza. Mr is also notorious for having conversations with himself inside his head and then saying something out loud like you should know what he is talking about....like you were participating with him in the 5 minute conversation he's been having with himself about the yard, or picking up the dogs' medicine, or even worse flight school stuff...

I digress, time has passed and out of no where I hear...


Mr: "I can't wait to build forts!"

Me: "What?"

Mr: "Yeah I can't wait to build forts, climb rocks, take him camping"

Me: "Huh?"

Mr: "Our future baby...I can't wait to build forts him and sleep in tents..."

Me: "Well I sure hope SHE likes to go camping!"

Mr: "HE"

Me: "SHE"

Mr: "Whatever as long as we don't have a "Hot" daughter, I'm fine!"

Me: "Excuse me...our daughter will be pretty."

Mr: "Yeah, well I don't want a 'very pretty' daughter, cute is good. I want a cute daughter."

Me: "What are you talking about?"

Mr: "Very Pretty Girls are whores and marry old men."

Me: "You are insane."

Mr: "No I'm serious, very pretty girls date old men and marry them for money."

Me: "Really, so I married you I guess that mean I'm not really pretty then."

Mr: "I'm talking about 10s here..."

Me: "Oh really...so I'm not a 10"

Mr: "UGHHHH...you know what I mean."


Yes, there is my foot in mouth husband....

25 comments:

Patience said...

He sure kept digging his hole didn't he. Gotta love men.

PinkSass said...

Hilarious!!!!

Crazy Shenanigans said...

Haha, this is hilarious. I love that he busted out the scales.

Jessica Lynn said...

Hahahaha! That literally made me laugh out loud. "I can't wait to build forts!" Too funny!

Expat Girl said...

Haha thats so funny! my husband was talking about the same thing the other day about how he doesn't want our daughter to be hot..I was like erm she will be pretty why would you say that? HIs answer...well if she gets my genes she will be....ha thanks honey!

Mandy said...

Gosh I sure miss you guys! That was a hilarious story!

PS there is NEVER the right time to have a baby in the AF. Just do it already!!

J.L.S. said...

My husband is also notorious for holding conversations in his head then blurting out the most random things and me having to figure out where it came from and where it is going. It always takes a few minutes because he can't seem to figure out why I don't understand what he is talking about!

Love that Mr. Jetplane just kept digging himself a deeper hole!

Bumpkin on a Swing said...

No one can make me laugh like you at times, makes all this reader stuff worth it. Is Idaho a preferred option? Idaho.....sheez really?

Samma said...

That is hilarious! Great story!

Moe said...

Wow!!!! "I'm talking about 10s here" - my jaw literally fell open.

That conversation reminds me sooooo much of things my boyfriend says. :)

USCEmily said...

This is funny because it reminds me of my boyfriend. I was contemplating going to the tanning bed the other day and he agreed that I should because I am "hot with a tan" his words. So, of course I had to ask if he thought I was not hot right now because I don't have a tan. I totally understand about having a brutally honest significant other.

Sara said...

Oh goodness! That makes me think of the commercial where the man is going shopping and the woman yells out from another room, "I'm an eight" and the guy says, "No, baby, you're a ten!"

THE Stephanie said...

Wow. He just doesn't know when to stop, does he? LOL. Much like all men...

Allison Hasel said...

Hahahah! Oh Mr. Jetplane, you really did it to yourself there. Too funny! Makes me miss those little random chats with N. :) This is all so weird, we're talking about babies! Just found out our friends who were married at the end of last year are pregnant! Crazy!

Young Mom/Wife said...

That was hilarious! I love how he just kept talking after the first dumb comment implying that you aren't a 10. You have to love the way male communication works.

lovelylittleruffles said...

Hahaha that's hilarious! Sounds like a conversation my husband and I would have!

Day Old News said...

OMG, this had my laughing out loud at my desk. He owes you!

martha - caknitter said...

LOL Men! I hope he makes it up to you, but then he might dig himself deeper. :-)

Hannah @ The New Black said...

That is too funny! I almost think it's fun to set my guy up like that. Sure I am not hurt, but I like th play like I am. ☺

Legally Fabulous said...

hahahahaha that's so funny.
if i've said it once, i've said it a thousand times: boys are idiots.

HellcatBetty said...

HAHA!! Yup, that sounds like my husband. And then they try to back paddle and it doesn't work. Silly men...

d.a.r. said...

Oh men....that is hilarious!

Sara said...

Oh this is fantastic!

Mrs. EDO said...

HIlarious! Must be a man thing. My hubby is constantly having conversations with himself in his head and randomly inserting me in the middle of that conversation.

And my husband and I have been in discussion about when to get "knocked up" once we get our next orders. Urgg...the life of a military wife!

Hannah Noel said...

Ouch....

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