Somethings are going on that unfortunately I can't talk about on a blog. Somethings that are truly upsetting and made me question people's morals, ethics, and who they are as a person.

This isn't happening 'to me' but it affects me. Things are happening that I can't even begin to wrap my mind around and it is truly upsetting to me.

I'm trying to stay level-headed and not get myself involved. I can't get myself involved, its not place, its not my fight, its not my responsibility, but I want to do something, say something, hit something.

Thank God I'm heading to Idaho tomorrow for a few days, hopefully that will clear my head and somethings will work themselves out.

I'm sorry for my utterly vague and probably totally illogical post today. I needed to vent alittle.

Calming myself this morning with a little Jeff Buckley.... its working...alittle...

My desk is out of stock. Yes, the desk that I have been looking at online for over a month now. The desk I look at every single day is out of stock today. Today the day that I was actually going to buy it...its out of stock.

Its probably my own fault to blogging about it and now its out of stock.

We sold our office desk on Craigslist last week and now I have no desk.

I called Target and it was a pointless conversation with someone who gave me no information. Just basically keep checking the website. No I can't look for you to see if and when it will be back in. She didn't even ask me what I was looking at. Just keep checking the website.

That's a BIG ASS FAIL! I'm pissed. I'm UBER pissed.

If anyone sees this on Target.com please let me know. Not that I won't be looking 3x a day but still.

I know there are other desks out there but this is what I want. Its similar to my Pottery Barn inspiration desk that is $650... ugh... I need this desk to be at my residence prior to August 24.

Hey Target! Do you hear me.... I want my mother freakin desk...

Okay, so I complain and complain that even though I'm 29 yrs old I regularly get carded for alcohol and have even been carded when renting an unrated foreign film (that was a couple of years ago). I was also asked last year if I was getting my nails done for prom. Uh no, jackass I'm getting married and I'm missing my 10 yr class reunion because I'm going to be on my honeymoon.

Yes, I know..oh you poor thing... oh I wish I had your problem...oh cry me a river...you'll be happy when you're 30 and that still happens....

I've heard it all people.... but seriously it gets annoying.

I have been in a business meeting, giving a vendor presentation to prospective clients and at the end of the meeting the VP of Marketing turns to me and says, "Please don't take this the wrong way, but how old are you?"

(Excuse me... how am I suppose to take it.... you can't believe that someone my age (or whatever age you think I am) could be a compenent and knowledgable saleswoman???)

I told him I'd tell him how old I was if he told me how old he was. He laughed and said, "Wow you're pretty quick on your feet. But seriously, how old are you?"

I was around 25 then, and in all honesty looked maybe 21 on a good day.

But the point of this story is that while I may have been blessed with 'young' looks and clear skin, I have noticed that I have developed deep wrinkles in middle of my brows and I'm flipping out about it.

I started using wrinkle cream about 3 months ago and I'm even trying to stop myself from scrunching my brows and doing anymore damage to my face. I notice I do this when I'm reading, working, and having any sort of serious conversation.

So I ask you, what type of wrinkle creams do you recommend. I don't want to spend an arm and a leg, but these wrinkles need to stop pronto.

Help me!!!

According to our Sailing Instructor on Saturday.... Motor Boat People and Sailing People.

Some enjoy the journey, others just want to get there. Motor Boat People are great people, they just have a different philosophy.

Well... sorry old chap, but this lady is a most definitely, unequivocally a motor boat person. That we found out this weekend.

Scene: Marina on Base, @ 10am, Temp 96 degrees, Heat index went up to 110. Standing all day on concrete with 8 other students, sweating our asses off.


Big Bottle of Water - Check
Light Colored Clothes - Check
50 SPF sunscreen for face - Check
30+ SPF for rest of me - Check
Hat - Check

The Jetplanes stood all day and listened to what I call, complete and utter jibberish. Tact that, Jib that... Is the wind to your back, to your front, what side is the high side....



The information didn't even go from one ear and out the other, it pretty much just reflected off my sweaty head and flew away. I pulled Mr. Jetplane aside at all 3 of our lovely 10-15 minute breaks and explained that I didn't understand a damn word this guy was saying and I really didn't feel comfortable.

So after the day of instruction, we headed down the beach with all our rigging. Mr. Jetplane and I started rigging our boats. There are 2 ropes that are used in the rigging - 1 that runs the top portion of the sail and the 2nd is knotted onto the back of the boat, through the pulley system on the bottom of the sail and through a large pulley that is knotted off near where you sit. This rope is used to steer the sail.

So I'm ready to push off of shore, and the big Marine that went in front of me had capsized into the water. So YES, I was nervous. Right before I push off the instructor informs Mr. Jetplane that my sail can't extend the whole way because our knot is too close to the pulley. So he re did the knot and I pushed off.

And off I went, I felt the boat pick up speed and the sail swung to the other side. I let it go, as I was supposed to and I didn't capsize. I was so proud of myself. Then all of a sudden I looked down. The rope that ran from the back of the boat through the bottom of the sail was sitting in the bottom of the boat and not through the sail. I looked onto the beach and yelled "OMG! What the hell... how am I supposed to get back?"

I see Mr. Jetplane throw off his life jacket and prepare to jump in the water and retrieve me and my boat. The instructor stopped him and called over the rescue boat. (Oh NO it gets better..or worse)


While waiting for him I re-tie the back knot and prepare to run the rope through the pulleys again. The boat pulls up and he helps me and I ask him to double check my knots. Then he pushes me off again.

And I'm off and I start picking up speed. Literally, I felt like I was going 60 MPH, when in actuality it was more like 5 MPH. I preparing to take the 1st buoy and I make the turn. I almost clear it but I can't turn. Now I'm veering off course and heading to shore. Then I try to turn again toward the buoy and I start picking up speed. By now I'm far away from the rest of the students and heading toward the no-student-sailboat-zone. The reason its a no-student-sailboat-zone because the area is used to dock people's large sailboats. We're talking $100k plus sailboats.

And now I'm heading in that direction and I can't get my boat around. I look around and no one is watching me.... I start screaming... I mean screaming...


"HELP! HELP! I'm going to hit one of these boats!"

I seriously yell this for probably 2 minutes. No one comes. Then I totally break down and start crying. "Can someone please help me? SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME! HELP ME! SERIOUSLY HELP ME...."

And then a tag the sailboat parked in front of me and hit the poles on the dock. Then I think... "Okay. Well I'm stopped." And then I start crying even more.

After what felt like another 5 minutes the rescue boat comes to get me again. He says... "Are you ok?"

I respond very matter-of-fact... "No! No! I'm pretty f-ing far from okay! I am so not okay. I hate this and I'm very upset."

He says... "I can see that. Don't Worry. Its okay. You're okay. Do you want to keep going?"

I say " Hell no. Pull me and this f-ing boat to shore. I hate this and I don't want to do this anymore."

He asks... "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I completely sure. Get me on shore."

He pulls me to shore and reassures me the whole way its okay. At some point close to shore I realize that I'm acting like a total crazy bitch and I apologize to him. He says its okay.

We get to shore and the instructor asks if I'm okay and if I want to go again.

I re-confirm yet again that I'm not interested in sailing anymore. He asks me what went wrong and I explain to him that I started veering off course and all I do is see myself hitting one of those big expensive sail boats.

To that the instructor says" Oh, don't worry. We would never let you come near any of those boats...."

To that I say... "Oh really... I'm pretty sure I hit it."

"No, I'm sure you didn't hit it!" He turns to the rescue boat driver and he interjects.."Oh yeah. She did it!"

So I spent the rest of the hour that the rest of the class was sailing sitting with the instructor and learning all about his life.

He asked me if I wanted to sail with Mr. Jetplane in his boat. I told him that I don't really want to be that close to him right now. Which was probably a good thing, since he capsized twice. Yeah he deserved it.

Needless to say, I don't think I'll be going sailing again anytime soon... But I do have my A Mate Certification. Mr. will be getting his B Certification, but as for Mrs. Jetplane... HELL NO!!!

Well you can feel free to learn a little more about the past with my sis in law here.

Let's us say that we are VERY different people. She has decided to get married next month in Vegas on a Tuesday the week before the Jetplanes are going on a week long vacation. We found out about this last week and I had to beg to get time off. We're flying out late afternoon on a Monday and back on Wednesday morning. Yeah! Vegas for like 48 hours, maybe.

Due to the time frame and the distance from all of her family and friends, very few people will be able to be in attendance. In total maybe 10 people including her and her fiance will be able to make it out.

She made my wedding process and wedding day at times extremely difficult. Not to discuss it too much, but she basically threw a fit the entire length of our engagement knowing that she and her son were going to be in the wedding. She complained about everything from having to get a dress, being asked to attend the shower (which she didn't do), rehearsal dinner, getting her hair did (which I paid for), the brunch the next day (which she threw a fit in front of all our family and friends), and let her child pee in my parents back yard next to the pool. Oh yeah! Good times all around. I'm not even going into detail here... it was so out of control that I nearly lost my freaking mind.

Mr. Jetplane says I need to get over it... I don't think I'll ever be able to accomplish that... sorry I'm not that big of a person...

First things first, THANK YOU all so much for all your kinds words and Birthday Wishes yesterday, it meant the world to me. You all are fabulous and I adore you...air kisses to you all.


Now I will provide a disclaimer: Mrs. Jetplane is not, I repeat, is not, HIGH MAINTENANCE and generally I set my expectations rather low so I won't be disappointed. But I was rather disappointed with my birthday this year, and I'll be honest, the last great birthday I had was turning 21.


Mr. Jetplane is not a romantic. He is not a planner. He is not mushy, sentimental, or emotional. I, on the other hand, am all of those, generally speaking.



My birthday started out ok. He sang happy birthday to me in the morning and brought me chocolate milk and my morning vitamins and met me for lunch. He had to drop Charlie off at the vet (more to come on that). We had a nice lunch and I dropped hints about flowers and a card.



**Now let me say this... I am a card person. I believe you should always get a card and put something meaningful in it, especially on birthdays and anniversaries. You tell the person how you feel about them and how much they mean to you. I want (nor almost demand) a card for special occasions and I want him to write something meaningful in it. This is a non-negotiable point.



4:30 rolls around and he calls to tell me that we're not going to be able to pick up Charlie until 6:30 and she notices that he has fluid in his lungs and a slightly enlarged heart. Okay, so I go into total freak out mode and start researching what all of this means to our baby Charlie and I start losing my sh!t. Cancel dinner, I'm not interested, I just want to get home and go pick up our big ol dog.


I get home and we decide that we'll just stop in at Applebees since its near the Vet. OMG, we used to go to this location all the time and hadn't been there in some time.

The service was horrible and our food was totally inedible. I looked like it sat under a hot lamp for 10 minutes, which would make sense since everyone around us got their food first.

She came back to the table to ask how it was I just simply asked "Well look at it! You tell me." "Oh sorry we have a new heat lamp." I kindly remarked... My meat is not chewable and is cold, the vegetables are steamy hot and not even what I ordered and all I can eat is the baked potato. His rice is literally brown and the chicken is stuck to the plate. We can't eat this and we're late and don't have time to wait another 25 minutes for our food." Manager came and covered our ticket and apologize. Oh well Applesbees... I'll take my business elsewhere...



Moving on down the road of birthday fun... Get to the vet. Charlie does have a slightly enlarged heart on the right side. He doesn't have a murmur and has no other symptoms associated with enlarged hearts. A normal heart for a dog his size is something like 10.2 and he is 10.7. Also he has fluid in his lungs. We are going to work on the fluid issue for the next 2 weeks and then see about the heart.



What led to all of this... Well around 2am - 5am he sometimes sounds like he is going to throw up so we rush him outside and he'll spit up some water. This used to happen maybe once everyone 3-4 months. Its happened almost everyday for the past 2 weeks. Then yesterday morning he didn't want to eat his food. OKAY... something wrong.. to the vet you go.



So our big baby was all drugged up when we picked him up at the vet and just looked so sad. We let him lay on the couch, generally a no no, but when he's sick all rules are made to be broken.



So back to the BDAY - ummm my hubby got me NO CARD and NO FLOWERS. He said that he didn't have time to do it with Charlie's issues. But between the time he dropped Charlie off at noon until we picked him up at 6:30 he had time to


1. Take a nap
2. Sweep the floors
3. Go swim laps
4. And hang out with the neighbor rebuilding his motorcycle
5. Shower
6. Get dressed
7. And hang out with the neighbor rebuilding his motorcycle

Yeah!!! I'm pissed.

1. He knows my deal with cards, he felt that rath several years ago
2. He always gets me flowers

He then told me that he has all these things planned for this weekend since its our anniversary and this weekend was like a co-event. (Guess I was just suppose to assume that, since you didn't say anything, and led me to believe that you had something planned for my bday.)

Okay, I can deal with that but GET ME A CARD! MAKE ME A CARD. WRITE ME A FREAKING NOTE ON THE BACK OF A RECEIPT.

So we'll see how this weekend is, because right now, Mr. Jetplane is treading on some thin ice with me.

But THANK YOU for dealing with my bitter, sad lil tweets last night. Much love to you all.. XOXO

Not a big deal until I saw the front windshield of the van that had a wrap around decal that stated, " Yes I am one of those Twilight People!"

THIS... Yes you see correctly... Peanut Butter and most importantly the Battle of Creamy v. Crunchy.



You see the Jetplanes have fundamentally different views on peanut butter, I am a creamy and he unfortunately is a crunchy, go figure right? Well, since Mr. Jetplane was not living with me for 6 months (don't flip out recent readers...he was at training) I NEVER brought crunchy. Well now he's back and bitching about the fact that I don't buy him crunchy peanut butter. So again this morning while putting peanut butter on his raisin toast and filling Charlie's KONG with peanut butter he shouted from the kitchen... "Hey...Seriously hon, buy me some crunchy peanut butter!"


Me: "Get over it! There is no need to have 2 different peanut butters in this house and I BUY the groceries. Its a total waste of $4 to have 2 jars of it in the house."

Him: "Whatever!"

Me: "Ok I'll buy you your crunch peanut butter but you decide what you don't want this week instead."

Him: "Huh?"

Me: "Yes that's right... I have to buy raisin bread, tortillas, Naked Drinks, Gatorade, Soy Milk, certain type of healthy cereal, Luna bars, and I have to wait in line for a certain type of lunch meat....etc. etc. etc. So you decide what can go so I can buy your peanut butter."


Him: "Fine! Then I'll go buy it myself!"


Me: "Really? You understand that we, and by we, I mean I, spend $400 a month on groceries* and I don't really see the point in having 2 jars of relatively the exact same food."


Him: "I said I'll buy it myself!"


Me: "Okay... you do that, but keep in mind if you bought the groceries... you would tell me what I wanted wasn't a necessity and we didn't need it... Or what I wanted wasn't 'healthy' and it shouldn't be in the house..."


Him: "No I wouldn't.... (thinking...) Okay.... you're right... I would do that..."


*$400/ month for groceries may seem high to some, but we generally bring our lunches to work and don't go out to eat that much. But I am making an effort to reduce the costs... and therefore 2 jars of peanut butter... not needed.


This is what I felt like doing to him with the peanut butter this morning...

Well, Monday morning never seemed as sweet...

I'm tired, really tired, but things are going ok. By ok, I mean 10000x better than I expected, but not great. We're all very different people with very different personalities.

They are on vacay.... I am not...
They are 24-25 yrs old.... I am not...
They smoke a pack a day... I do not...
They enjoy drinking...alot... I do not...

I'll admit I went into this situation with a very negative attitude and I'm most definitely not the glass half full type of gal... if you ever thought Mrs. Jetplane was Mrs. Positivity... sorry to disappoint, I'm sooo not. I know it, accept it, even though Mr. Jetplane does his best to take me away from the dark side, he can't. Anyway...

The point is... when I stay at someone else's house (excluding my parents) I act a certain way, I'm on my best behavior. I treat people stuff a certain way. And I ask... is there anything I can do... here let me help you empty the dishwasher... here let me take out the trash... oh please let me help you empty the grocery bags from the car... Yeah that's common sense right?

Well obviously not because someone doesn't do that. I made dinner last night, a large pasta dish, chicken, and garlic bread. I got a mmmm... this is good... Not one "thank you". Hello? They didn't even help clear the table.

We played a game on Friday night... On purpose, I didn't pick it up, just to see how long they would leave it out.... 3pm Sunday.... come on people...

Okay, enough... deep breaths... they are leaving tomorrow.... and someone may work late tonight...

Thanks again for all your support, you guys are the best...
XOXO

THIS!

I'm shocked and totally confused by this woman. I don't know if I'm suppose to pity her, be concerned for her mental state, or be upset with her.

Okay, the past 2 weeks, I have been disgusted by you. It's one thing to show underage drinking and its other to show it being completely condoned by a room full of adults.

These girls are 17 and 18 years old. They shouldn't be drinking at a bowling alley, how did they get home from said bowling alley. And don't these kids realize that they are being taped and this is on national television.

So Mrs. Jetplane wasn't an angel, far from it, but I wasn't on national television.

And, Jeanna's kids are out of f-ing control. I was completely shocked and outraged that they talked to her like that. I wouldn't have stood for it. So what if your dad was a horrible husband and you heard him talk that way to your mother. You know it hurt her self esteem and know its not right. I speak from personal experience here, boys.

You know right from wrong, and I hope to God you see yourselves on tv and realize what total a-holes you are.

And Jeanna, take charge of your life and let your kids know that you're their mother and you demand their respect.

Rant over... Happy Hump Day to all.

XOXO

Oh and I also bought a set of t-shirt sheets in lime green. The master bedroom is navy, white, and hints of lime green. Mr. Jetplane has t-shirt sheets on his bed in Texas and says he wanted them at home. So we'll see how it goes, if I don't like them, well they'll get put to use on the air mattress.

I'm kinda a sheet snob, and I require them to be really soft. I personally enjoy an all white bed, but soon learned after we moved in together, that wouldn't be in the plan for us. You see Mr. Jetplane's body emits some weird stuff in his sleep and he literally stains the sheets. My beautiful high thread count white sheets, I bleach the crap out of them but it got to be really annoying. My mom said it was metals and impurities in his skin, I don't know what it was other than totally disgusting.

So I'll give you the update on the t-shirt sheets. I have to admit, while they do keep me warm, they remind me of shacking up with my old college boyfriend, he had jersey sheets.

So there... My shopping is all out in the open. But I promise to be good the rest of the month....

Sorry for the Debbie Downer moment. Bitching closed for this morning.

Happy Hump Day to you all...

Ok, I live in P'cola, and during the summer time you see people going in and out of gas stations without a shirt on (guys only thank god). We also have some friends that lived in Hawaii for quite some time, so they prefer to never wear shirts or shoes, but that's ok, if you're a surfer, with a nice body by the way.

BUT, today last time I checked was November, and granted it is rather warm today, that doesn't mean you shouldn't wear shoes...

Ok, let me back track a little.

I went grocery shopping this morning at Wal-Mart. I was making my way through the aisles, minding my own business then I see a woman with 2 grown ass kids, I mean the boy was probably 10-12 and the girl was a good 14-15, neither of these kids had shoes on....

Oh, but that's not all. At the check out line, I got to stand behind a lovely 40ish woman with 2 small boys around 3-5 yrs that were standing in her shopping cart without shoes on. Then I looked down... this woman wasn't wearing shoes either... Her feet were black. Her boys were horrible, one of them slapped her in the face and she hit him right back. I was totally shocked. She then kept apologizing for how her kids were acting, blaming their poor behavior on a cousin or something.

Wow.... my mind was blown...


Personal Rant.... People when you are at the store, if you use a shopping cart, can you please push it over to the cart caddy. Especially, when its less than 50ft away from where your lazy ass parked you car....

Rant over... back to enjoying my Sunday.

and pissed. I tried to do the 3 column thing... obviously it didn't work.

#1. My previous template when I made all the changes said it was invalid. I did it 3x.

#2. Ok, so I reverted to the Classic Template, but then when I did Contol F, I couldn't find "outer-wrapper" in the template provided by Blogger.

WTF, am I an idiot? possibly...

Ok. I haven't written about my mom in a while. As you may recall, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer several weeks ago. My frustration level with service that she has been receiving from a Dr close to home is at an all time high.

My mom was referred to this female doctor from a cousin whom had recently been treated with her, so my mom took that referral very highly. Well needless to say, that Dr, in my own humble opinion, is a POS. She has totally dropped the ball, and my mom has suffered from it.

#1 this is cancer people, you shouldn't have to explain that to a doctor. This process of her getting a mastectomy should have already been completed, she shouldn't have to repeatedly call to get results, find out referrals, etc. If she went into the DR with a broken arm, it would be treated right away, why can't this be... Ok, let me explain a little.

1. Up until a complete of weeks ago, she didn't even know what stage the cancer was. They had never cared to tell her.
2. They referred her to a hospital in the central part of the state that didn't accept her health insurance.
3. They didn't even figure that out, my mom called and spoke to several people at the hospital. They finally said we'll take you but you have to process your own claims to the insurance company... WTF are you kidding me... do I want to go bankrupt.
4. They had never given her a copy of any of her records.
5. My mom asked to go to St Louis, and the Dr said that wouldn't be possible.
6. Finally, my mom called to get all her records to take them to a new Dr she found in STL, at a top notch cancer institute, that takes her insurance, and you know what the Dr's cancer nurse said to her.... "Well we're gonna need you to come in and do another biopsy...
"Excuse me, she's getting a freaking mastectomy. I know its cancer, we've determined that weeks ago. She wants it the hell out of her why do we need to take another look...

So today, my mom has her appointment at the Sitman Cancer Center, a great cancer center associated with Barnes-Jewish Hospital and Wash U Medical School. Her appointment is with the Dept Head. I very excited for her, I mean as excited as you can be in this situation.

Its a wonderful, teaching hospital and there she will be able to participate the new procedures, clinical trials, and see some of the Midwest finest Doctors. I have a close friend that is an oncology rep for a drug manufacturer and she says that outside of Mayo, Sitman is the best cancer institute in the Midwest.

She should leave today with a plan of action, an idea of next steps, and hopefully a date for the surgery. Which is more than her other Dr ever did for her.

I'm so proud of her for taking control of the situation, and not settling for the BS that the Dr was giving her.

FYI - her original DR referred her to a State University Hospital located at the capital city of our state. My step-father is an elected official and has state health insurance. The Medical School which is funded by the state would not accept my mother's health insurance. What kind of crap is that.

For now, I'm letting the bad thoughts exit my body and only letting good energy in....

Today, in case you weren't aware of is Boss's Day. Yeah, I didn't know about either until yesterday.

Our management in general is great. They are easy going and reward us greatly, in non-monetary ways, bringing in lunch, snacks, birthday cake and ice cream once a month, donuts on Fridays, etc. They even gave all of the women in the office flowers on Valentine's Day. In general they treat us, the employees, well. I can't complain at all.

So yesterday, a member of the admin staff, let's us all know (excluding mgt) about today, and asked if each of us could throw in $5 to have lunch brought in. We were getting BBQ sandwiches, baked beans, etc. In our main office there are about 25 people (excluding mgt) so that puts us at $125.

Well, it has been a fiasco getting people to contribute $5 for the meal. Some people didn't want to participate, others weren't going to be in the office that hour and didn't feel they should give money if they weren't going to be there, and some people were just being pains in the asses.

Its $5 freaking dollars people, I understand we're in a recession here people, but come the f@$% on, a meal from this restaurant is usually $8 - 9, so if you eat the lunch you've gotten your $$$ worth. And let's say you can't be here to eat, well you ass has certainly taken part in the monthly birthday celebrations, various lunches, snacks, pot lucks, holiday parties, retirement parties, etc.... with out ever putting in dollar one.


Sorry, I'm done venting on....

Oh wait 1 more thing. Ok there is Administrative assistant's Day and Boss's Day, what about all the other employees.....

Better get back to work...